long wknd, long drives
it's been a while since my last golf outting, maybe a year ago? yesterday louis, willie, and i went to bear creek to play some twilight golf. that just means at you just walk on around 5:30 or so and pay a discounted rate but you probably won't get to play 18 holes before it gets dark. $13 per person including green fees and carts, not bad at all. we went to the driving range and split a bucket. willie and louis were striking the balls pretty well, mine were horrible. it didn't look like a very good round coming up.
to make things slightly interesting we decided to play skins, each hole worth 50 cents from the losers. basically if one person won the hole he'd get paid a total of $1 for it. if there was a tie then the next hole would be worth $2, etc. overall i didn't shoot a very good round, even though we didn't finish 18, but i know i got two snowmen. but i did win two pretty crucial holes, one worth three skins and the very last worth four skins. heh heh, i said foreskins... i also won one long drive and two closest to the pin, even though technically one was like a centimeter on the fringe. get this, the very last hole, which was worth the foreskins, i was the only one to hit the green on the par three so i already won the closest to the pin. willie ended up behind some trees and louis went way right. so i'm thinking i've got this hole in the bag. i was on the green but pretty far away from the pin and i had been putting like shit all afternoon. willie laid up and got on the green in three. louis lost a ball and i'm not sure what else he did but he was pretty much out of it. i'm on in one, willie is on in three, if i two put he's gotta make his medium length putt to tie. actually, willie was just off of the fringe and had to chip on leaving him a medium length putt on four. i make a weak putt and leave it short by about half the distance. i'm sitting on two strokes, willie is still on four. i've got to sink it in the next two strokes to win i figure. it takes me three more to sink the fucking putt! that puts me at double bogey, or five strokes. if willie makes his putt he ties it and no one gets the foreskins. if he misses i win them. i'm pretty scurred because willie has been money all afternoon on his putts. there was a small chance he'd miss because it was longer, slightly downhill, and there was finally some pressure on him to make his putt. he jerks it (hawman) and misses the putt! i ended up the big winner with 7 skins and 3 challenges (1 long, 2 closest). willie wasn't far behind as he actually won a bunch of holes but none that were worth any more than just one. i think louis won one hole, one long drive, and one closest to the pin. the results don't tell the story but we're actually fairly close in lack of skill level.
i didn't sleep for shit last night, don't know why. i got up in the morning and turned on the tv and flipped it to the animal planet. the show that was on was some pet vet show, real life vet experiences. they bring in this turtle from the zoo that has pneumonia, which apparently isn't good because they don't have diaphragms so can't cough any of the crap out. so to directly apply antibiotics to the turtle's lung tissue the vet decides he's going to take a household power drill and drill holes thru the shell directly its lungs. to knock the turtle out, the anesthetics are poured on a large towel and the turtle sits on it soaking up the fumes. once he's out the doc starts drilling this hole the width of a ball point pen right through the shell. get this, after the first hole gets drilled the turtle wakes up and pokes his head upwards! i guess the doc didn't think this was an issue because he proceeds to drill the second hole towards the other lung. they insert these cathethers into the holes and then apply some waterproof putty to hold them in place. he looked like some sort of frankenstein turtle with those two things sticking out of his shell.
i just saw a commercial on tv, counting crows and goo goo dolls tickets are selling for $10 each for this thursday's show at the woodlands. these seats are on the lawn, it's kinda like the shoreline amphitheatre in norcal. it's a haul but i think it'll be a good show, maybe i'll pick up a ticket.
oh yeah, this gal just winked at me on match.com, apparently she's into asian men...

2 Comments:
...and lipstick.
3:03 AM PDT
She may be into Asian men...but you ain't into fugly gurls...
1:34 PM PDT
Post a Comment
<< Home