chennizzle

i think taxi drivers here all believe in reincarnation and have a better life waiting for them. and that the smaller their car, the easier it is to outmaneuver large trucks and death. if you thought i was a wreckless or aggressive driver, you ain't seen shit. most of the roads here are two way, with one lane going each way. tonight's driver spent 75% of the time in the other lane. out here, instead of turn signals they have flashing headlights and horns. it's even worse when they get calls on their cell and talk while playing chicken on the road. here's what that sounds like: honk honk naan and curry pick up punjabi red dot damnit masala dosa flying carpet chutney beep beep.

oh yeah, so there are cows all over the place that just roam freely everywhere. at work i was polling two guys: if you had two swerve one way or the other to save your own life, and swerving one way you would hit a cow, swerving the other you'd hit a human, which way would you swerve? they were laughing at me when i asked but i think it's a very real situation. one immediately said they'd make hamburger, the other actually had to think about it before settling on steaks as well.

i had this personal pan pizza at work today, kinda their version of the combo. there was this reddish diced chicken and instead of tomater sauce there was some kind of brownish chili paste. pretty interesting really. here the locals smother their pizzas with ketchup.

thanks for the concern you've shown by asking if i'm ok. there was a bombing in mumbai, luckily i'm in chennai. as dave huang pointed out, the last time i was in india, november 2005, there was a bombing in the country as well. when i fly home friday night it's gonna suck with security all tight, i better expect a cavity search. hey, can you examine my prostate while you're in there?

check this out, pretty bizarre. probably something they came up with at 4am and drunk (hell, it's 4:52am here and i'm dehydrated):
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6456501462866396737&q=genre%3Acomedy
hmm, how would i torture her... i'd put her on the ten foot line of a volleyball court with a men's height net. then'd i'd have someone set me tight low two's and bomb away. don't worry, for whatever reason i wouldn't be able to hit her. no snap i think. put her in the back of the court, however, and her head might as well be another wall.

sweet, a lizard just crawled under the front door into the room. i'm hungry.