i should've dozed off

towards the end of the flight from cleveland to montreal the woman across the aisle decides to start chatting with me. keep in mind she's had two gin and tonics, here are the highlights of the conversation:

do you speak french?
nope.
oh. they're going to make fun of you.

what do you do?
i'm a consultant with accenture.
oh, accenture. they used to be andersen, before they lost all credibility.

and then on the cab ride to the hotel the cabby starts in on his pending 2nd divorce and how it's best to live life while you can and do it alone. damn. here are some conversations i would have liked to have engaged in today:

do you know anything about mountain bikes or puppies?
keep your twenties, the next 10 dances are on me.
oh, you're hanky! i've read your blog, that shit is funny! you're right, mcphee is sooo gonna win it all!
hey, i'm looking for a new partner for this avp season. i'll take care of the passing, blocking, and defense. all you need to do is set me the ball. you down?
i just got these, do they look real? i have yellow fever.